Saturday, September 5, 2009

The truth among friends

Three of my friends are teachers and on Thursdays they have late meetings at school and, since my house is walking distance from the school, their kids are friends with my kids, and they trust me to watch them my house is stuffed with kids on Thursdays.

Never a problem. Actually, I kind of like it.

Until last Thursday –the day that William returned home.
The kids were great. Two out of three parents picked up their kids before 8pm.

Our kids were getting ready for bed. I’m looking at William, wanting to strip him and throw him down on the table.

Parents of kids number three do not arrive.

They don’t arrive at 8:30. My kids are in bed.

Their mom finally arrives at 8:45. We invite her in. We talk. I politely point out that her youngest is crashed on the sofa. I hint that she might want to get her three kids in bed.

Finally, I say “William’s been away for four days, he just got home a couple of hours ago. I’m sure you want to get home to Your Man.”

She said, “Oh, no. He’s on his way here.”

? !

William smiled.

I smiled (or was it a snarl?)

I wanted to yell:
I’ve watched your kids since 4:15. I fed them an after school snack, I made sure they did their homework, I fed them a VERY healthy dinner (grilled fish, rice, snow peas, salad, fresh fruit for dessert) taking into account their allergies and the dietary restrictions of your religion, my kids are in bed, I need my man, I want you to leave.

Her Man walked in. The guys start talking. And sometimes we do stay up late with friends talking – really late. That is fun once in awhile. But tonight, I just wasn’t in the mood (for friends, that is!)

I sat there listening to teacher soap opera politics and trying to listen in on what the guys were talking about and then also talking to myself “Lynn are you just being a selfish b*tch who doesn’t even make time for your friends?”

I gave them an hour. We ate, we drank, we talked, their kids crashed on our sofa. But when the clock struck 10, I got her out of the room and told her the truth. I know I’m all open on my blog and everything, but I haven’t really spilled my guts to this friend before.

“Listen, William has been gone for 4 days and 13 hours. I want to – well, you know. Some other time would be great, but right now we need our privacy.”

She gave me a blank look. I couldn’t tell if she got it or was upset. But they went peacefully into the night within 15 minutes!



  1. Preach it sistah!

    Sometimes it takes a swift brick to the noggin for people to get the hint, and many times they don't oblige even then. You're a neat gal for lots of reasons - but I think I respect your tolerance-to-frustration ratio best; especially on a night where you had different social recreation plans designed.

    Hope you worked all those frustrations out. {wink}

    Hey listen, thank you SO MUCH for wandering by Casa Hice and leaving your footprints. I was genuinely surprised, delighted, and honored to find a new follower first thing this morning. It made my day, even more than the promise of the sun coming out after almost a week of gloom and rain in Florida (hurricane season bites).

    Looking forward to getting to know you and your blog! Please come back to Casa Hice often. The welcome mat is always out.

  2. Good on you for telling your friend what you needed...more of us should be so honest.

    Another great post.

  3. Maybe that's the difference between men and women. I would have pulled the guy to the side an hour earlier and said, "Dawg, you gotta bounce. I gotta get cracka-lackin'" Okay, maybe not like that, but if they are true friends, it should no big deal. Your girlfriend should have given you a high five!

  4. just stopping by from sits, have a great weekend!

  5. Oh Lynn... you are such a sweet woman... a real friend would have heard ya the first time... but hey... it built up the anticipation for another hour right??? :)

  6. Lynn - you are far more polite and nice than I would be. Obviously you are someone I need to get to know better (I need to learn to be more tolerant sometimes).

    Thanks for dropping by my blog I look forward to getting to know you better.

  7. This entry stopped JUST as it was getting good. :)

    Good = R rated. I hope the rest of the evening went horizontally. Or vertically. Or upside down. Whatever.

  8. Veg, you're d*mn right it was good!!!

  9. Thanks for stopping for condoms...I don't want to think about it. I suppose it is a good idea to have a supply for the girls too.

    As for organized I have a lot more to do. And who knows how long it will last. I am lazy at heart.

  10. You are hilarious. Do you wear that poor man out? But honestly, I understand. I travel for work. Sometimes the neighbors are at my house when I get home from a long trip. I dont want to see them-they are nice and all but.... Its been a long few days sleeping alone. I have actually pulled the husband aside, "Dude, you gotta go. Im tired and well lets be honest- Kate looks good." Done. He hustled his chaty wife out the door.

  11. When my first friend got married, we made a "no phone calls or visits past 10 pm" rule.

  12. Sounds like someone can't take a hint, huh? I really think that some folks are clueless...manners-wise, emotionally and common sense-wise.

  13. Mr. Man & Chris - you guys are a bit more assertive than William (but I guess it is obvious that I'm the more aggressive one) & Chris I so do not wear that man out. I asked him. He runs marathons, so...

    Elizabeth - what great friends! I think my Mom seemed to call everytime William and I kissed when we first married. Her calls all went to the answering machine.

    Melissa - glad u said that. I was worried that I was the one being rude. Because sometimes we do sit around and talk for hours.

  14. Um, if she's a real friend, she understood and said, "Sweet mother of pearl, I'm so sorry! We'll get out of your way!" and ran out the door.

    I mean, that's what I would've done. Just saying..

  15. Sara - you can come over any time!!!

  16. Hope it was a very fun, very relaxing night from there ;-)

  17. Blank look = jealous woman with no sex drive.

  18. anymommy - yes, you could say we reconnected
    S&S- I hadn't thought of that, but it could be...she's not someone I've talked about it with!

  19. I'd struggle with husband and I need to have exit strategies for just such an instance...we like to do things...our way...