S3xy Laundry

No this is not a post about lingerie so if you’re looking for that, you’ll have to click somewhere else. Yes, click off. (Yes, I just said that)

But don’t leave if you want to know about laundry S3x in the pantry style.

I am a laundry sorter freak. They might have self-help classes for people like me. I sort by color. Not darks and lights and whites. I have a black load. And a red load. Even a pink load.

And I sort by category. I separate towels from everything else. Sheets have their own stack. So do table linens. But towels get hypercategorized – white towels are one load (yes, they are), and kitchen towels aren’t ever washed with bath towels (no way!)

But I have this other philosophy about housework too and that is ---PAY ATTENTION this could save your life – okay, make your marriage a little more peaceful.

Where was I?

Lynn’s advice to save your life marriage / partnership: If the person you love wants to do housework let him / her do it as they like. Yes, however they like. H3ll, they are doing housework. Back off.

So even when our tikes were little and I wanted the baby clothes washed with the baby detergent, I shut my mouth because William (who I love) was doing laundry!
And these days when he and I both tackle the mountain of clothes that used to be a laundry room he doesn’t go for my categories and subcategories. He swiftly combines the pinks and reds. He mixes darks with jeans (okay, jeans are one load too. I’m weird, I admit it)

But today I broke a rule. I saw him place a tablecloth in with a load of sheets. (Tablecloth in with the sheets –Oh No!) I opened my big mouth.

Me: You can’t put a tablecloth in there

Wm: Why not?

Me: Because it’s with the sheets.

Wm: So?

Me: That’s like an eating thing with a sleeping thing.

Wm: Why does it even matter, they are getting clean?

Me: Because the sheets are like, you know. And the tablecloth – we EAT on the
tablecloths.

Wm: Lynn, we do it on the sheets, I get it. But what if…

-and I knew what he was thinking –

Wm (continued): What if? We… do it on the kitchen table?

I forgot all about laundry for a moment. It has been awhile since we’ve done it on the kitchen table. (We’ve found a hideout in the pantry thanks to these kids of ours).

My mind flashed back – It wasn’t the most comfortable place we’ve done it or the most practical, but it was fun. We should tackle the table again!


And, of course, wash the tablecloth immediately afterwards –in a load of its own!