Friday, January 1, 2010

Don’t cry over spilt kool aid

This week 4 of my clients blamed their health condition on their spouse. Another lady just kept ranting on and on about her husband who placed a wrench on the mantle when she ‘had decorated it up really nice.’ She told me that wrench on the mantle was making her consider a divorce. She said, “He didn’t even notice how mad I was when he set that wrench there!” They’ve been married 30 years.


William and I were in college when we married and some of the things he did drove me crazy too (and some things still do).

The first almost freak out was about kool aid and kitchen towels. Let’s face it $ was tight in college. We didn’t really have anything nice for our apartment until one of my grandma’s friends sent us these beautiful kitchen towels for a wedding present. I came home one day to find huge red stains on them, kool aid (yes, we were young when we were married).

And, it didn’t wash out.

William response was, “It’s a towel. There is no way I’m ever going to figure out if a towel is ‘special’ or not. If it is such a treasure to you, put it somewhere else, like not in the kitchen.”

And you know what? He was right! Who cares? If the worst problem of my young marriage was kool aid spots on the towel, who gives a flying fiddlestick?

From that time on, when William continued to drive me crazy, I’d have to stop and ask myself, is this a big deal? Or is this just more kool aid?

Like when he killed one of my big house plants by planting it outside.

What is ruined towels and a dead plant to a man that makes me laugh, is a great cook and (I even knew way back then) would be a great father to my kids?

So let’s use this new year to get over the small stuff

Stop getting upset about things that do not matter

But before we start, let’s get the gripes off our chest. If you want, use the comment section to get your gripes out… I’ll be the first to comment!


  1. William the following things drive me crazy (but I’ll get over it)

    1. You are almost always the last one ready. I wish we weren’t late so many places. This is the reason why I go on ahead of you for something really important – the kids performances etc… and why I give you the wrong time (usually by half an hour and sometimes as much as an hour early) for major important things like weddings.

    2. I hate all of the scents you use – your cologne, your foot powder, your antiperspirant and even the shower gel. I do like your shampoo and conditioner. I wish you would change to things that you don’t spray because it totally makes me gag even if I am on a different floor of the house – I can feel my throat tighten up when you spray that chemical fog around yourself. I was going to start leaving the house before you and go for a swim –but your morning shags so totally make up for the stinky sprays.

    3. Paper, plastic, Styrofoam – I hate the stuff. I just don’t like the feel of Styrofoam and it’s not good for the environment and why do we need to go cups? Are we a coffee shop now? Also, even if we’re having a party for the kids, you know I like real plates, real cups, real silverware. I don’t care if it’s a picnic. I don’t mind doing the dishes. You always bring home plastic wear for any party. I hide it and don’t use.

    4. Sometimes I seriously wonder if college football will be the death of you. I don’t mind the screaming and the yelling (except I worry about your blood pressure) and excitement. But I think it is a little weird how if your team loses you are in a bad mood the rest of the day (sometimes even when they win, but don’t play well you’re not happy!)

    But I mega love you anyway!!!

  2. What a great reminder. My complaints:

    1) to my ex please thing beyond yourself and about our son. Find back up ways to keep your end up when he's suppose to see me so they don't keep falling through.

    2) to all my patients. Keep your appointments and if you must cancel, please be curtious and call.

    Have a Happy New Year.

  3. The Koolaid analogy is outstanding. mostly, it is all just fucking cool aid. Happy New Year, friend. Crying babies keep me from listing gripes. That is their gift to you for the new year.

    You are generous for tolerating smells that make you uneasy.

  4. ; -)

    Here's mine.

    Dear. Learn that your anal, obsessive, and anxiety driven mood swings are your problem. I will not cater to them. I will, however, go for a long walk.

  5. Well, I am confronted with the choice of walking away from everything that I worked for because the people that I live with are complete and utter assholes!

  6. He eats all over the house leaving dirty dishes in every room, and leaves his dirty clothes on the floor.

  7. You know what they say... don't sweat the small stuff!
    Another good cliche? Choose your battles! LOL

  8. Next week, we will have been together for 19 years. He puts up with my blogging instead of cleaning, he bought be a laptop for Christmas because he wanted me to have a new one.
    I'm sorry, I don't have any gripes right now other than the fact that he won't buy a new pair of shoes and he won't wear the new ones that I bought him.

    He knows how to use his tools. ;) He's perfect for me!


  9. I get the shit ot as it happens so right now i have nothing on my chest except hair and that ain't going anywhere.

  10. He's a noisy gum chewer. I resolve to never give him a piece of my Bubble Yum again!

  11. Glad to see most of us just have kool aid gripes (or nothing at all!)

    OTIN (hugs) ur situation sound serious!

  12. Put your effing shoes away!!!

    Whew. I feel better already. Thanks.

  13. Oh the things I have learned to ignore over the years! Except his addiction to air freshener that makes me quit breathing and gives me a migraine. He really doesn't get that I would rather smell the dogs sometimes than die.

  14. 1) I expect YOU to take care of your kids while they are here. I am not a slave or their nanny. I am your whore tho.

    2) If you want to have sex with me? Go to bed at a decent hour. Please don't wake me up later for a session. I neeeed my beauty sleep.

    3) Don't drink all the booze around here without offering me some first.

    4) Use the air freshner in the bathroom...that's what I put it in there for.

    5) Love me hard--like I love you.

  15. First, I love this post!! I need to remember that kool-aid stained towels aren't a big deal.

    Second, Hubs please stop putting your clothes on the kitchen table.