Here are some snipits from my inbox & comment threads:
“At the end of the day, I’m just too exhausted to even think about doing it.”
“We had time when we both worked days, but now he’s working night shift and we never see each other.”
“…the house, the yard, the kids, he does his thing, I do mine, we don’t even sit next to each other when we watch TV anymore.”
Yes! We all get tired – life is busy, busy, go-go-go!
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
First of all, if you REALLY don’t have time, there’s nothing wrong with a quickie now and then. Do you honestly think when William and I get alone in the pantry it goes on for hours? No! This is a quickie before dinner or getting it on while the kids are running around outside.
Second of all – you really have more time than you think. To my TV reader --- if you have time to watch TV, you have time for sex. If he’s not sitting by you – sit by him! Sit in his lap!
Here are some other ideas for those short of time:
1. The “sex alarm clock” If you go to bed after midnight, exhausted (too exhausted to brush your teeth even) and there is no way you can get it on. Even if you (or your lover) has to wake up early, set a sex alarm. The sex alarm wakes you up an hour or so before your normal wake up time. Or it can wake you two hours after you’ve gone to sleep –you can have “middle of the night sex” and then go back to sleep and wait for the morning alarm. Keep some mouthwash next to the alarm, because after all you didn’t even brush your teeth before going to bed.
2. Shower together. You’re going to take a shower and your love is going to take a shower. Combine the showers together – help each other get clean and wow – look at the time…. The time for shower number two can be best spent together. (or for you clean freaks, get it on first and clean up in the shower after)
3. Lunch time. If one goes to work and the other is at home – can you meet for lunch? Yes? Do you both work anywhere near each other that you could meet for lunch? Meet half way?
4. I would never encourage anyone to use their sick time if they weren’t sick, but if you both just happened to get sick on the same day (wouldn’t that be nice?) and had to leave work only a bit early (not too big of a hit to the paycheck if you don’t have sick time) and both ended up at home at the same time and before the monsters get home from school. Wouldn’t it be great if you didn’t feel too sick to get naked and crawl into bed together? Okay, you can use vacation time if you have to. Or get to work late in the morning and stay later at work to make up the time.
5. Get your kids on a schedule. Get them to bed at a certain time. Even if they manage to stretch it an hour later… you still have time between their bedtime and your bedtime to be with your love.
6. See my past tip the movie rule If you have time to watch a movie (or sport event, or TV show) you have time to …
7. See my past tip no TV if you have kids young enough to be influence (bribed) by TV / movies.
8. Share your tips!
What else works? Share your tips!!
P.S. Jill ...
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In 2011, I wrote a blog post called "I Feel Like an Apathetic Piece of Poo"
in which I complained that I didn't feel like I was doing enough with
myself...
1 day ago
